Let’s be clear. This is not Happy Hour. These are not real celebrity encounters. I’m not as star-studded as the Surferwife.
We live in Chicago where the only pseudo-celeb we see is No Tippin’ Pippin. But, at least we don’t have to deal with the likes of Speidi. (#twitterwar)
But my husband, who pretends he doesn’t read this blog but who is also cyber-stalking me (love you baby!) has suggested I start hosting a regular feature. It goes like this: I talk about celebrities with whom I think he would or would not get along. He is sure you will all be fascinated by this.
The first entry is easy. Even David agreed, there is only one place to start. That place lies with Matt Damon.
Because people? He’s the ultimate-everyman. He does it all.
He punched that guy in the throat with a BOOK. If you try to tell me anything about Jason Bourne or stunt doubles or editing, I will laugh in your face. And then send Matt Damon over to punch you in the throat with a book.
He also plays poker, wrote the screenplay that launched his career, won an Oscar for writing that screenplay, went to Harvard, was hilarious on 30 Rock and continually makes jokes about Ben Affleck. How could you not love this guy?
David would love this guy. In fact, David regularly comments on what great friends he thinks the two of them would be.
I can see that. David can be a rather gregarious guy. Other times he can be a total hermit. He’s a paradox like that. But when he respects someone, he’s there to the end. He can bring the smarts and back it up. He can smack talk Affleck like no other.
I imagine they’d get together and play poker while discussing book-fighting techniques of both the cerebral and physical varieties. A good time will be had by all.
Unless David reads too much into this entry.
In conclusion, I’d like you to suggest some celebs I include in this feature. Over time, I’ll let you know who I think David would have a beer with and who he’d like to smack.
Matt was interviewed in Toronto a few years ago, just after he had his first baby. They asked him if he had any parenting advice. He said “No, I am new at this, I am taking advice.” He looked around the red carpet and yelled “Anyone have advice to a first time parent?”
I shutter to think what the Canadian public yelled back to him.
I'm pretty sure I would get along with Matt Damon, too.
and he's fucking Sarah Silverman! Awesomeness.
This is great! I love Matt Damon, and so does my husband.
What about Russell Crowe? My husband likes him as an actor, but I can't imagine getting along with him, LOL.
Or Joaquin Phoenix? Crazy or crazy cool?
(Can you tell I watched Gladiator recently?)
I'm thinking Robin Williams. Cuz if your hubby can banter with that man, I will be impressed.
i love david!! and i'm kinda scared to ever say i feel anything other than love towards him because i'm scared of books-to-the-throat.
does he really think he can compete with the ultimate HOTNESS of the magnificent George Clooney? plus, george is all about helping the impoverished.
I am taking this very seriously. The problem is, I am not up on current celebrities. So here are my picks of people who were famous when I was still watching tv. Maybe they still are:
-Neil Patrick Harris
-Any of the Backstreet Boys
-Tom Petty
Hmmm. And some women.
-Condoleeza Rice
-Lorena Bobbitt
-Any of the Spice Girls
Looking forward to this!
I can see Matt being a really great buddy to have around…what about a local guy for you Bill Rancic???
I think you husband is right about this being a regular thing.
What would make it supah-saaaaweeet! would be if you took requests.
Please do some granny porn stuff like Madonna.
Dammit! Liz got here first and stole my future-husband-if-I-lived-on-Fantasy-Island…Mr. George Clooney!
So how about funny man David Spade? Could the David's be friends?
I want to be fucking Mat Damon. I will deny this to my husband of course, but it's true.
What about Russell Brand? I think he would be a hoot to hang out with. Ive been a fan of his for so long. Its good to see him becoming more mainstreamed in the states.
AWESOME idea!
Where to begin… I wish Matt Damon as my neighbor on one side and Matthew McConaughey or McConaugHOT, as I like to call him was my neighbor on the other. He's got kids, I could babysit, if he brought them over without his shirt on. Do you think your husband would get along with him?
Others to consider:
Bradley Cooper
Conan
Jen & Ben – either/or they are both darling in my book
Steve Carell
Ellen
Oprah
Sandra Bullock
Have fun!!
Love Matt Damon. Can't imagine anyone not getting along with him. Here are some suggestions: Matthew Mcconnaughey, Tom Cruise, Jimmy Fallon, Denzel Washington, George Clooney and Dane Cook.
Yeah, any guy who can do a good throat punch is okay in my book!
I would suggest other celebs such as Guy Fietti (is he a celeb?) and Hugh Hefner…hmmm…wonder how my hubs feels about these two.
Yep, I say Oprah too. Cuz she lives there and stuff.
You are a zany one, you are. Okay, let's hear about fictional friendships with both Wilson brothers, Ryan Seacrest's mom (they are close, those two), Henry Winkler, and Justin Bieber. That last one's to make us all feel old, which is all Justin Bieber is good for, as far as I can tell.
Love this idea! And yeah, who wouldn't get along with Matt Damon. How about Conan O'Brien? Would David get along with him, or is he too kooky? Not to get too political or anything, but how about President Obama? He also seems like a pretty easy going type.
Yeah, I'd want my husband to be friends with Matt Damon, too, because it would mean I'd get to look at Matt Damon more. And maybe get him to let my husband borrow that tight black suit he wore in Oceans Eleven to go up the elevator…
This is so random & hilarious.
And I think David and Ryan Seacrest would totally bond over non-fat lattes.
Oh, my husband has a huge man-crush on Matt Damon. LOVES him. I think a lot of it has to do with the Affleck bashing, but the book punching is also high up on the list.
As to possible friends, how about Steve Buscemi? Or John Goodman? Or Elvira?
I wanna know what the hubs thinks of Snuffleupagus and Obama and the Backstreet Boys. But please don't send anyone over to punch me in the throat with a book if you don't like my choices. I'm just a little behind the curve these days.
Oh. And Prince. Or the Artist Formerly Known As Prince. Or Whatever. And Michael Jackson. Even if he's dead. I still want to know.